The Constant Is Change

Lately, I've felt a bit like Madonna.  Having to reinvent myself, yet again, to stay ahead of the curve.  Change  seems to have come sneaking up, my 10-year plan moved into the 5-year plan, and now is quickly moving into the 3-year plan.  And it needs revisions.

Probably there are lots of things happening at once to make this appear more noticeable.  Max, our oldest, has left for college.  This leaves Sam and me at home together...for a short three more years.  It's an adjustment which will take a few more weeks.  I have more time, as it turns out, to do what I want to do - or need to do.  And to revise and rethink where life is taking me, what the goals are, what the tools are, and where the joy is.

The market isn't what it was 8 years ago when I took the job I have now.  I'm used to looking for a job, applying and then getting it.  No problem.  But not this time.  Maybe the Universe has something else planned for me, but that path is not clear.

There have been several times I've had to reinvent myself - figure out who I am now - like after college, or after divorce.  Each of those times was a time of great change.  This time, it seems like there are more tools in the tool belt to cope with change.  Nonetheless, it's an opportunity to grow, and growth can come with it's growing pains.

This time, I'm seeing an opportunity to shift in more ways than just the physically outward appearance of a downsized daily family life.  I find myself scrutinizing my spiritual life, my belief structures, my habits and ideosincrasies and asking myself what I find most important.  Also, what is True and what can I Trust.  Of course, as change goes, that which was once True and Trustworthy may not be so now.  This time, however, I find myself looking deeper into that which is more of the essence of Truth and Trust - not just the words, but the vibration of that which is behind those concepts, and where I find those within.